Kris - thanks so much for this. It's a really helpful framing of something that I kind of think I've been fumbling towards (my saying is that the older I get, the less I think I know), but phrased really well. The one thing that crosses my mind is that I kind of feel like this is approach is somewhat predicated on finding yourself in a moderately unthreatened position. My sense (which could be wrong, of course) is that many people involved in some of the debates of our times feel sufficiently endangered or marginalized that taking an approach like what you've recommended might feel like giving up inches that have been won with blood. I don't have a great answer to that. I think that for me, I should try to incorporate this into my Weltanshauung, but I'm interested in whether or not this is something you've thought about. I mean - look - as a late 30s white guy with moderate economic success, I'm the least marginalized person ever. I should OF COURSE approach the world with humility and kindness, if only as karmic payback for the hand I've been dealt. Not everybody's going to be in the same position, though.
I've thought of this and I agree with you. There can easily be a wedge between what game theoretic play should be made at the group level and the expressions of humility we should make at the individual level.
Politics is concerned with the group level and why I wrote that I don't know if my suggestions scale. I don't think they do.
I'm primarily concerned with how we talk to each other (I have a post called the Zeroeth Commandment which shows my hand). So while I may not have much to offer to the political discussion I think it's worth being conscious of and resistant to letting the macro spill over into our daily micros with others.
I went back and found that post, and yeah. I'm at risk of some confirmation bias, here, but I agree that it's generally incredibly important to pronounce somebody's name properly and call them by the name they want to be called. Extending that to pronouns only makes sense, though I hadn't thought about it that way.
No idea how to scale these things to society but on an individual level if I care about and respect your agency I don't see how I can't call you by your chosen name. It's not my place to pretend our made up rules apply to your specific situation when dealing with you as an individual.
Kris - thanks so much for this. It's a really helpful framing of something that I kind of think I've been fumbling towards (my saying is that the older I get, the less I think I know), but phrased really well. The one thing that crosses my mind is that I kind of feel like this is approach is somewhat predicated on finding yourself in a moderately unthreatened position. My sense (which could be wrong, of course) is that many people involved in some of the debates of our times feel sufficiently endangered or marginalized that taking an approach like what you've recommended might feel like giving up inches that have been won with blood. I don't have a great answer to that. I think that for me, I should try to incorporate this into my Weltanshauung, but I'm interested in whether or not this is something you've thought about. I mean - look - as a late 30s white guy with moderate economic success, I'm the least marginalized person ever. I should OF COURSE approach the world with humility and kindness, if only as karmic payback for the hand I've been dealt. Not everybody's going to be in the same position, though.
I've thought of this and I agree with you. There can easily be a wedge between what game theoretic play should be made at the group level and the expressions of humility we should make at the individual level.
Politics is concerned with the group level and why I wrote that I don't know if my suggestions scale. I don't think they do.
I'm primarily concerned with how we talk to each other (I have a post called the Zeroeth Commandment which shows my hand). So while I may not have much to offer to the political discussion I think it's worth being conscious of and resistant to letting the macro spill over into our daily micros with others.
I went back and found that post, and yeah. I'm at risk of some confirmation bias, here, but I agree that it's generally incredibly important to pronounce somebody's name properly and call them by the name they want to be called. Extending that to pronouns only makes sense, though I hadn't thought about it that way.
No idea how to scale these things to society but on an individual level if I care about and respect your agency I don't see how I can't call you by your chosen name. It's not my place to pretend our made up rules apply to your specific situation when dealing with you as an individual.
https://moontowermeta.com/borders-are-subjective/
Wow ! This was my first time reading anything you’ve written. Won’t be the last. Sharing now - @reubstock on Twitter . Keep it up - great stuff.